Death Is The Tarn, And I'm The Conduit

by Crippled Beggar

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02:24

credits

released April 29, 2017

Sean Hart- Guitar, Vocal
Chad Gourd- Bass, Vocal
Patrick Pepper- Drums, Backing Vocal

Vocals, bass, acoustic guitar, and guitar solo tracked @ Studio Rare Skulls, Providence RI by Sean Hart

Drum tracking, guitar tracking, and mixing @ Studio Wormwood, Mansfield Center CT by Dave Kaminsky

Mastered @ New Alliance East, Cambridge MA by Nick Zampiello

Cover art by Rene Fleming

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Crippled Beggar Providence, Rhode Island

Blackened Grind Violence from Providence/Killingly

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Track Name: Pendulum
I keep a notebook up on the shelf, written apologies
A memoir to all that ever was, or that ever will be
I believe by the time you read this
I'll be gone already
My troubles, they mean to offend you
In the least offensive way

Hangman pulling the cord tight
Kick the chair and hang myself

North to East I swing
Air trapped in my lungs
Zip the body bag
Tie the toe and tag

Cut my noosed neck free
Let me rest in peace

I keep a notebook up on the shelf, written apologies
A memoir to all that ever was, or that ever will be
I believe by the time you read this
I'll be gone already
My troubles, they mean to offend you
In the least offensive way

Double bag the evidence
Throw my body in the trash
Track Name: Mill Fire
Social delinquents who can't hold a job, no education
Living at home so they hang at the mill, kids on vacation
Useless

Pretentious pathetic parasites
Worthless
Feckless incompetent bastards
Kill yourselves

Mindless ashing, place is catching
Too fucking drunk, too fucking stoned
Historic site catching aflame

How does it feel to face punishment
Cry like a little bitch, you deserve this

Rejected kids gathering in the night, no place to be
Underaged girls and a six-pack of beer, 2 grams of weed
Social delinquents who can't hold a job, no education
Living at home so they hang at the mill, kids on vacation
Useless

Pretentious pathetic parasites
worthless
Feckless incompetent bastards
Kill yourselves

You stupid bastards burned it to the fucking ground
Track Name: K-Hole
Unplug the world
Turn off the lights
Bottle of Jack
Small bag of whites
Ease all the stress
End all the pain
Quiet the mind
Shut down my brain

Thoughts disappear
I don't mind this slightly different form of sickness
Eyes rolling back
All emotions, love and hatred, slowly fading
Enter the void
Formless beings slowly stirring all around me
Leaving behind
Blood and muscle, strength and weakness, pain and decay

Return
To the body
Violent Shaking
Nausea
Limbs are tensing
Fever taking
One more
Pill to swallow
Shot to follow
Lay down
Breath is fading
Heart is waning

I can't feel anymore
I can't see anymore and
I can't hear anymore
I can't breathe anymore

I can't feel, I don't care
I can't see, I don't care and
I can't hear, I don't care
I can't breathe, I don't care at all
Track Name: Dead Women Crossing
Eyes adjusting to take
in the gruesome sight
Search the body for a pulse
but nothing is found

My gaze casts down
At the human viscera
Staining memories of a time
When I had all of my teeth

If I start driving now I could probably
Make it into Sundown by sunrise
I'll leave memaw a note down in Amarillo
Confessing that her first born son died

Find the hole in his head
scarred over with all of his
poor intentions, brains drip
from what used to be his ear

I take his bloody jaw in my hand
I help him turn the other cheek
his lifeless eyes stare at the wall
silent red drapery and vignette

I lean in close
To the human viscera
Staining memories of our time
"Who has a listening problem now?"
Track Name: Hate Fuck
Cut ties, old lies, fresh hate, sealed fate

Bite your flesh, caress, gripped neck
Sick flashback to what you did

An empty fuck is all you are
Manipulating naive hearts
You tore down everything I built
You've never felt an ounce of guilt
Nothing sacred, nothing left
My middle finger up your dress
You ask me please don't ever leave
This time you're the one deceived

Hate fuck you, then I'm through

Pulling hair and grinding teeth
You scream out "keep fucking me"
I ask you if you want more
Choking, cumming little whore

I stand, get dressed, walk out satisfied
No words, no kiss, only goodbye
You mean nothing to me. Nothing
I am done with your shit forever
Track Name: Broken Hilt
Even when I'm dreaming
I want you dead
This hate consumes me
My thoughts obsess
To make you suffer
And fucking beg
Imagining the carnage
Of your mangled face

It's the only way I can sleep

Twisting the blade in your gut
Biting your fucking ear off
Killer inside of my head, silent dream prisoner
Leaving a vacant body as it wanders the night
Awaken to discover a knife within my hand

Can I control my rage
Despite this chimera?
Betraying my conscience
Succumbing to fantasy
When will I be at peace?
You can't be forgiven
Lucid dreams, sleepwalking,
Killing you every night

Even when I'm dreaming
I want you dead
This hate consumes me
My thoughts obsess
To make you suffer
And fucking beg
Imagining the carnage
Of your mangled face

And then one night
I knock back some pills
I leave this world
I am bodiless
And now these dreams
Become so vivid
Blurring the lines
of reality

Now I can rest
Feeling vengeance

Stabbing the blade in your head
Breaking the fucking hilt off
Killer inside of my head, silent dream prisoner
Leaving a vacant body as it wanders the night
awaken to discover your blood upon my hands
Track Name: Hordes Of Degenerates
Something's gotta change
Someone needs to die
Gun in my hands, voices in my head
Vision turning red, palms collecting sweat
I'll have no regret planning out your deaths

It sickens me to my core
To think of what you are

Deep breath, let out
Two shells, no sound
Trench coat dropped down
Gun's out, sights found
Where's your God now?

Something's gotta change
Someone needs to die
Gun in my hands, voices in my head
Vision turning red, palms collecting sweat
I'll have no regret planning out your deaths

I must confess, I hate you fucking people
I hope you die, your minds are fucking feeble
Wasting your lives, you're all so fucking worthless
Losing your minds, your views are fucking stupid
I must confess, I hate you fucking people
I hope you die, your minds are fucking feeble
Wasting your lives, you're all so fucking useless
Losing your minds, your views are fucking stupid

I am the last thing you will see
Death is the tarn and I'm the conduit
I am the last thing you will know
Death is the tarn and I'm the conduit

Gun smoke, sight's choked
Nine lives, bad joke
One shell, one mouth
Deep breath, let out
I'm your God now
Track Name: Day Of Ashura
Haram
Shia converge for the mourning
Talwar
Striking their flesh for their sins
Imam
Chastising glares from the stairway
Tatbir
Letting blood flow in remembrance
Haram
Shia converge for the mourning
Talwar
Striking their flesh for their sins
Imam
Chastising glares from the stairway
Tatbir
Letting blood flow in remembrance

Senseless undertaking
Their sanity, fading
Gashes tearing open
Tissue falling out
Senseless undertaking
Their sanity, fading
Gashes tearing open
Tissue falling out

With the Twelvers around
I'm lost and I'm found
Whips, chains I am bound
I fall to the ground
When the Twelvers arrive
How much life with still thrive?
Who will live and who'll die?
I know I'll be just fine

Young men gather in the dirt roads
Lashing their backs and heads with blades
Grieving elders flogging themselves
To shed their blood in the name of God

The desert sun begins its rise
The light reflects off of the blood-soaked ground
Piles of bodies writhe in pain
Their skin waving in the sand-filled wind

Youm-e-Ashura
Track Name: Lambaste
Way down
Familiars dancing
Inviting
Coalesce

Substances are calling me
I refuse to answer them

Empty my hands anyway
Take everything away

This road's long and winding
Blindfolds ain't comin' off